In honor of the Christmas holiday, Westwood One Sunday Night Football analyst James Lofton presents his “12 Christmas Wishes for the Playoffs.”
For the Pittsburgh Steelers, a healthy Big Ben dashing through the snow (though it may have to be on the road in Foxboro, Baltimore or even Denver)…
For the Houston Texans, a pair of brand new hamstrings for Andre Johnson…
To the San Diego Chargers, the passing trio of Gates, Jackson and Floyd. And if they don’t make the football tournament, at least they’d make a good 3-on-3 pick-up basketball team. It’s not that far of a drive to the famous courts at Venice Beach…
To the New Orleans Saints… well, they don’t need me. Drew Brees is the Santa of Bourbon Street – all his receivers get plenty of presents. His 37 touchdown passes have landed in the arms of NINE different guys. But Jimmy Graham must’ve been the nicest this year: he’s received the most gifts with 9 TDs…
For Rob Ryan (he of the long white hair and bowl full of jelly), the wish that his Dallas Cowboys defenders stop playing like little elves…
To the San Francisco 49ers, a healthy Braylon Edwards to be targeted by Alex Smith…
Another gift for the Houston Texans (they’ve waited 10 years, after all)… in song…
T.J., the last QB left,
once two guys named Matt got hurt,
And if you never heard of him,
we would fully understand.All of the other QBs
used to laugh and call him names.
They never let poor T.J.
join in any Texans games.Then one early December day
Kubiak came to say:
“T.J. with your rocket arm,
won’t you guide my team tonight?”Then all of Houston loved him
as they shouted out with glee,
T.J. the Texans QB,
you’ll go down in history!
To the Detroit Lions… Megatron: The Playoff Edition! It comes without an off switch… let opposing defenses try to figure out how to stop it…
To Tom Brady of the New England Patriots, a starring role in a remake of It’s a Wonderful Life… George Bailey, Tom Brady? It even sounds alike. And he’s already got his (Victoria’s Secret) angel. On the other hand, Tom isn’t broke and it’s only Jets fans that wish he’d never been born…
To the Indianapolis Colts… a win… fine then, how about a couple lumps of coal and maybe a little Luck for a change?
To the Green Bay Packers, a new set of tackles to keep Aaron Rodgers upright as he attempts to lead his team to a near-perfect repeat…
Finally, to the Philadelphia Eagles, who will need the Christmas miracle to end all Christmas miracles to make the playoffs, a simple message: see what happens when you’re mean to Santa! You can’t just buy all the gifts for yourself in August.
– James Lofton
James will be spending Christmas in Green Bay, with Dave Sims and Hub Arkush (sidelines). A special Christmas Night edition of Sunday Night Football hits the air at 8PM Eastern on Sunday.
